“How to Find a Grief Counselor”

Some people might mistakenly assume that a grief counselor is mostly focused on helping people “bounce back” from a loss, but real resolution and healing actually happens when you can carry the memory of your loved one without anguish, says Jill Cohen, a New York-based grief counselor.

“We try to find ways to incorporate him or her into your ongoing life, so the person isn’t really gone forever,” she says.  That may mean anything from running a 5K race to raise research funds for the cancer that claimed your mom’s life to starting a new tradition of eating your granddad’s favorite foods on his birthday.

For some, being able to memorialize your loved one may mean first working on being able to accept the death and resuming normal daily routines. Just as no two people’s grief is exactly alike, what they need from a counselor isn’t identical, Cohen says.